I’m excited to have one of my favorite editors, Christine Dore, back on the blog today with some fabulous advice for authors. She’s shepherded dozens of books from the idea stage to final printed copies, so she’s seen it all. And one thing authors sometimes forget is that it is always to your benefit to be working with your editor, rather than against him or her. Publishing people are all in the business because we genuinely care about books and want to see authors thrive. We want to make sure you and your book are a success, and the more we can rave to our teams about how professional, gracious, and hard-working you are, the happier we all are.

Of course, every editor has their own idea of how casual or formal they like to be with their authors, but here are Christine’s great tips for building a happy, productive relationship with any editor:

Email Rules – Or: How To Make Your Editor Not Want to Reply to You

Most editors thoroughly enjoy the lax-professional relationships we build with our authors. We know we’re working on “your baby,” and don’t take that honor lightly. We want to get to know you; we want you to trust us (so you’ll trust us when we suggest changes to your writing).

The best author-editor relationships are friendly, open, and honest. However, there is a very fine line you’re playing with here, as these are still professional relationships. Here are a few email ground rules to make sure you stay on your editor’s good side.

Use real words. You aren’t texting or tweeting, or (most of the time) typing with your thumbs. Please, for the love of whatever is holy to you, remember you are a real bona fide writer and write like it. Emails containing the following “words” are very likely to be pushed down the reply priority list: “soooooo,” “looooove,” or any other incorrect repetition of vowels or consonants; “literally” (in the colloquial use); “panic attack” (unless you did indeed endure this psychological and physiological traumatic event); “thx,” “k,” “lol,” or other text message abbreviations.

Take a deep breath and reread your email before you hit send. Editors understand that writing—and publishing—a book can be a very emotional experience. We love when you put in your all, but please remember that we do not mean any criticism, cover change rejections, or turning down of PR ideas personally. Many times, these decisions aren’t ours; we’re just the messengers. Please don’t shoot us with all-caps emails. We don’t enjoy being shouted at via our monitors, and the more you do it, the less likely we are to take your concerns seriously in the future.

Remember your book isn’t the only one on our plates. As much as we’d love to get back to you immediately, sometimes our days just don’t allow for quick responses. Some days we’re in meetings and away from our desks, other days we’re in editing lockdown, still others we’re dealing with one of the myriad of issues that crop up or we’re waiting for an answer to your question from somebody else. We are human, so if you don’t hear back in an inordinately long amount of time, a friendly, “Hey there! I know you’re busy, but do you have any thoughts on the below?” or “Hi! Would it be easier to set up a time to chat about my email below?” note reminds us if something’s slipped through the cracks without hounding us. Also: if you find yourself coming up with many questions, it may be best to set up a phone call or wrangle them all into one mass email so as not to flood your editor’s inbox.

These three little tips will help keep you on good terms with your editor—which makes him or her a better advocate for you with the rest of your publishing team!

Christine Dore is an editor and writer, specializing in creative nonfiction. Off-duty, she loves everything DIY and is developing her own brand of handcrafted home goods that give back to the worldwide crafting community. Visit christinemdore.com to follow her creative pursuits!